chapter four ——#BATTLING EVOLUTION

soft-construction

 导读问题 

【1】 What are his results and thoughts in the research on the subject of rejection?

Mostly a swarm of inspirational quotes and superficial rah-rah talks by sales coaches and self-help gurus. A lot of advice basically boiled down to  breathtakingly simplicity: Dust yourself off and move on! 

But he didn’t think so. Instead he believed there must be better advice and wisdom out there.

【2】 What are the answers to the three burning questions?

——Why don’t we talk about rejection more? 

Maybe the biggest reason people don’t talk about rejection more is because they’d rather discuss its easier-to-manage conceptual cousin—failure.

——Why is rejection so painful? 

Because people's brains, with rejection, could immediately start releasing opioids—just as they would if a physical trauma had occurred.

——And why do we fear rejection so much?

Because that instinct of fear is still riding around in our DNA——when we were hunting giant mastodons and living in caves, our survival depended on us sticking together and collaborating in groups. Being rejected or ostracized by our peers for whatever reason would leave us to face the wolves and the lions all by ourselves, which equals to death.

【3】 Have you ever experienced extremely upset event in your past like the author? How did you handle it?

Something sort of. I can not remember clearly. Times just flows and I gradually forget about that. I have been rejected for many times and I believe in the future this still will happen. Just take it easy, be prepared and know it goes anyway.

 比喻用法 

1）

the way a sports team analyzes its opponent

2）

It was as if the country of Italy had held a national conference before our arrival, at which the attendees devised ways to ruin our vacation

3)

more like a bug bite or a flat tire than an experience that can shut down a person’s ability to take risks forever

4）

wear their failures like badges of honor

5）

left her feeling like she was being stabbed.

这一章里出现了五个比喻用法，后面三个都是用了“like” 这个介词，3) 是 more like 后加名词性从句， 4) 是 wear.......like 后加名词， 5）是 feel like 后接从句。 1）是 the way 直接引导从句，后面语态时态正常，2）是as if 引导的虚拟语气，had done 结构。

因为比喻手法很吸引读者，一方面附带作者的情感引发读者共鸣，一方面让文章读起来不那么枯燥。这也是我读《明朝那些事儿》体会到的，当年明月 全是加上自己的分析及联想，不管着不着边际，读来如同作者和你对话，他说， 你听。时不时他自黑下，你也不厚道地暗笑。也觉得跟Economist风格类似。所以我们写作要多学习，揣摩别人是怎样写的，然后思考自己如何达到。

 积累字词 

put my entire dream of living and working in America into a drawer

 

If we believe the rejection is unjust or undeserved, we blame the other person and get consumed by feelings of anger and revenge.

两个好玩的表达，直译就是 把东西放抽屉里 （put .........into a drawer）和 被情感消费  （get consumed by ），当然你也可以这么理解，用引申义。

我们可以直接用这两个词组造一个句子：

Consumed by the feeling of anger, mom dedicated that I put the kite into the drawer. 

【1】

those who lash out （猛打，猛击）actually wind up （使结束，收尾，煞尾）feeling worse when they get revenge

这两对词也很有趣，我们可以用来翻译 乐极生悲 和 喜极而泣 这俩成语。

Those who lash out with laughs finally wind up getting into bad situations.

Those who lash out with happiness actually wind up with cries.

【2】

Tracy bent forward and started wincing

wince 畏缩， 也指脸部肌肉抽搐。

这样的词是在平常阅读小说对人物的描写中才会见到。

【3】

excruciating stomach pain

excruciate 精神上遭受极大痛苦，比 suffer 严重得多，还是spiritually

Painful in the body, excruciating in the soul.

【4】

hurled a brick at us

hurl 猛掷，相当于throw，仍

Hurl bricks/sticks

【5】

Dust yourself off and move on.

把你身上的土掸净，然后继续前行。

看来不但中华语言博大精深，英文也是一样可以类比的。

特别适合鼓励伙伴。记下了。 

【6】

There had to be more to it than what my searches were telling me

觉得一件事超乎寻常，电视剧里经常主角这样说，废话的一笔却是逼格甚高。

作文中不适合用，还是小说里故事描写的多。

 谈谈想法 

读这样的是 Rejection Proof，要说精彩，确实；要说无趣，不差。

主人公亚裔美籍，学历很高工作稳定然后三十创业，也算追逐自己的梦想了，在百天挑战拒绝中找到大众需求，然后不断尝试，并写下自己的故事，文笔斐然，读来引人入胜，也成功用视频和博文引发网友点赞和笑泪，最后帮助无数人走出惧怕拒绝的阴影。这是精彩之处。

无趣在于，你真是闲着没事干了，净找些没必要的差事，不就P大点事嘛，有时候一个念头，该干嘛就去呗，怕什么。当然我这是局外人角度，不是当事人感同身受。再说你的视角太过狭窄，国家，政治，经济，文化，历史，习惯和风土这些你都没考虑，和现在的人们追求升职加薪一样太无聊了。

为什么会有这两种完全相反想法？

因为这两天几本书在混合着一块读，电子书和人生书。

《万历十五年》的朝代更迭与人物命运，《万万没想到》的理工科思维解决现实问题，《买房的革命》是纯粹近几年的政策与经济变化，Rejection Proof 的个人面对拒绝的成长之路，还有现实与微博的魔幻交织。你懂得，这个神奇的国度。

在读书与写作中，这里的世界完全和现实——不读不写的我完全不同。而我还发现一个规律：同样的一个人，在面对不同的人交谈时，这个人的气场（表现）是完全不同的：父母，老师，同学，亲友，朋友也分好几类。

那么在 Rejection Proof里面，面对的大部分人都是陌生的，在提出要求后，我们会害怕被拒这个后果，那为什么呢？

因为期待不同。

你向初恋女友（男友）表白，心情一定是无比紧张的！

陌生人追着你说：我爱你。你肯定觉得他是个疯子。

犯错的你和得奖的你，回家见妈妈，心情和表现肯定不一样哇。

所以事情不同，表现不同。不过我还是好想没有抓到本质。

再想个几年吧。