CHAPTER 7 reading notes

Friedel Dzubas - Fair Use

1. Essence Daily （每日精华）

【1】句型

(1)
eg.
Many American scientists favour a more relaxed approach. But in an era of “America First”, the chances are slim of NASA being allowed to befriend China.

es.
AAA favour a more relaxed approach. But in an era of BBB, the chances are slim of ........

il.
The parents favours a more relaxed approach. But in an aera of learning, the chances are slim of little effort to mast any skill.


(2)
eg.
Several idle building sites suggest that some investors have gambled rashly.

es.
Several idle AAA suggest that BBB have gambled rashly.

il.
Maintains of idle "ghost houses" suggest that the government have gambled rashly.

2. Q&A  (导读问题与答案）

【1】 

     How would you define “failure”?

    Failure itself is a relative concept. We fail at many things, but through these failures, we learn how to grow, and that is the real success, not failure again. 

 【2】

    How faulures could be a blessing in disguise? Please include a story of yours.

    You never make mistakes, avoiding failures but believing it as blessing. 

    In classes, you feel lucky not to be called for answering the questions. But it is a total failure in learning process.

 【3】

    Who/What made us tend to avoid failure? 

 （1）Our education system, which judges rigorously based on performance and punishes those who don't do well.

 （2）Overbearing/critical parents, who don't let their kids screw up on their own often enough, and instead punish them for trying anything new or not preordained.

【4】

    Do you have any “VCR questions”? And what are they?

  Yes, so many in the process of my growth. In my pursuing girls, in my finding jobs, in my learning swimming. Now I know all I need to do is just do something, despite what it is and things will go naturally for the next stage.

【5】

     Have you done “do something” recently?  or are you going to do some “do something”?

Yeah, this morning I did not have breakfast and I was so hungry, not feeling up to do anything. And I just went reading a little of this chapter. Gradually it was done. I finished reading it.

3. Some thoughts while reading  

    （阅读过程中的思考）

Family backgrounds affect our thinking patterns a lot. Most of our habits in money, study and work are fostered in teenager. Money, for the poor is to solve problems while for the wealthy is to avoid them.

We tend to enjoy the wonderful results but ignore the tedious process. Aware that thousands of tiny failures lead to success, we could calm ourselves to do things we do not like and practice it in discipline.

Pain and joy both are ok in life. Do not deny anyone of them. Accept it when you are sad. Enjoy it when you are happy. Emotions do not define any reality. Facts do. Separate them. Find the solution. Do it.

Even the smallest ones matter. It means you begin to do it. Then something will happen. Chances are you will acquire the result you want. Or else, nothing will happen.

Choose one thing. Lean the benefits and the pain. Sustain both. Relish them. Savor them.

4. Words expected to remember 

     (必记单词）

sublet

to allow someone to use a house that you are renting for a period of time in return for payment

The person subletting in my apartment hadn't paid any rent fro three months.

rave

praise enthusiastically

When he entered the room with his kids, all of the people raved them.

stifle

to smother, prevent from breathing

You can not stifle any baby.

 我在Quizlet学习chapter 7:

 https://quizlet.com/263326909/chapter-7-flash-cards/

5. Sentences adapted 

     (摘抄笔记）

 【1】I grew up in a wealthy family where money was more often used to
avoid problems than solve them. I was again fortunate, because this taught me at an early age that making money, by itself, was a lousy metric for myself. You could make plenty of money and be miserable, just as you could be broke and be pretty good.


【2】Improvement at anything is based on thousands of tiny failures, and the magnitude of your success is based on how many times you’ve failed at something. If someone is better than you at something, then it’s likely because she has failed at it more than you have. If someone is worse than you, it’s likely because he hasn’t been through all of the painful learning experiences you have. If you think about a young child trying to learn to walk, that child will fall down and hurt itself hundreds of times. But at no point does that child ever stop and think, “Oh, I guess walking just isn’t for me. I’m not good at it.” Avoiding failure is something we learn at some later point in life.

【3】To deny that pain is to deny our own potential. Just as one must suffer physical pain to build stronger bone and muscle, one must suffer emotional pain to develop greater emotional resilience, a stronger sense of self, increased compassion, and a generally happier life. Our most radical changes in perspective often happen at the tail end of our worst moments. It’s only when we feel intense pain that we’re willing to look at our values and question why they seem to be failing us. We need some sort of existential crisis to take an objective look at how we’ve been deriving meaning in our life, and then consider changing course. You could call it “hitting bottom” or “having an existential crisis.” I prefer to call it “weathering the shitstorm.” Choose what suits you.  



【4】From the outside, the answer is simple: just shut up and do it. But from the inside, from the perspective of each of these people, these questions feel impossibly complex and opaque—existential riddles wrapped in enigmas packed in a KFC bucket full of Rubik’s Cubes. VCR questions are funny because the answer appears difficult to anyone who has them and appears easy to anyone who does not. The problem here is pain.


【5】The problem was that my emotions defined my reality. Because it felt like people didn’t want to talk to me, I came to believe that people didn’t want to talk to me. And thus, my VCR question: “How do you just walk up and talk to a person?” Because I failed to separate what I felt from what was, I was incapable of stepping outside myself and seeing the world for what it was: a simple place where two people can walk up to each other at any time and speak.


【6】Learn to sustain the pain you’ve chosen. When you choose a new value,
you are choosing to introduce a new form of pain into your life. Relish it.
Savor it. Welcome it with open arms. Then act despite it.


【7】When any result is regarded as progress and important, when inspiration is seen as a reward rather than a prerequisite—we propel ourselves ahead. We feel free to fail, and that failure moves us forward.