不再艹的精妙艺术——第一章阅读笔记

Uterine Catarrh - Wangechi Mutu

我现在在读The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck, 一个反直觉的方法来过好你的生活，作者是MArk Manson, 第一章的标题是：

别再尝试啦！

地狱间的反馈循环，

不再种艹的微妙艺术，

所以Mark，这本书我艹到底在讲什么？

Eric给我们提出的问题是：

• ️ What does Charles Bukowski’s success try to prove?️

  
  

• What’s wrong with the conventional life advice, which is fixating on what you lack? （fixate这个词需要掌握）️

  
  

• Can you use your own words explaining what the Feedback Loop from Hell is? 

我的答案：

• Charles Bukowski, after fifty years' failure as a writer, is a total loser and has nothing to descaribe except his bad life stycles until an odd editer, interest in losers, found him and enabled him to write something to publish. "And his success stemmed not from some determination to be a winner, but from the fact that he knew he was aloser, accepted it and then wrote honestly about it. So Charles Bukowski’s success tries to prove that fame and success didn't make a better person and that though self-improvement and success ofter occur together, it doesn't necessarily mean they're the same thing.

• Something deep in our society must be wrong. The conventional life advices spread by TV commercial and books and movies and songs always reinforce the same unconscious reality over and over: that you are not that, They laser in on what we perceive the personal shortcomings and failures to already be, and then emphasize them for us. They only serves to remind us over and over again of what we are not, of what we lack, of what we should have been but failed to be. They just care about good business not your mental health and cause us to become overly attached to the superficial and fake, to dedicate our life to chasing a mirrage of happiness and satisfaction. 

• In life whe we meet someone is better that us, then we become anxious about confronting him or her. This feeling makes us crippled and begins figuring out why we have changed in this way. Therefore we step into the stage of anxious about being anxious. More anxious. Or for the example of anger,  sadness, whatever negative moods. The fact that we feel so bad engages us into the Feedback Loop from He, to think cogent thoughts to begin with, to feel bad about feeling bad, to have thoughts about thoughts.

我是边读编写，这样子还记得读了什么。

在阅读过程中我觉得有意思的东西；

1. Crude. Distgusting. Depraved.

这三个词并列，那么depraved意思和前两个类似：

de·praved
 /dıˈpreıvd/  adj   [more ~; most ~]
  : very evil : having or showing an evil and immoral character
   a depraved criminal

2. Fame and success didn't make a better person.

Self-improvement and success ofter occur together. But that doesn't necessarily mean they're the same thing.

通常我们以为变得优秀就能功成名就，但并不是扬名立万就代表人格高尚。

3. All the positive and happy self-help stuff we hear all the time is actually fixating on what we lack.

A confident man doesn't feel a need to prove that he's confident. Either you are or you are not.

4. Ever notice that  sometimes when you care less about something, you do better at it?

Subtlety #1: Not giving a fuck does not mean being indifferent; it means being comfortable with being different.

Subtlety #2: To not give a fuck about adversity, you must first give a fuck about something more important than adversity.

Subtlety #3: Whether you realize it or not, you are always choosing what to give a fuck about.

Control what you can. Ignore the rest. Define what it means. Choose the right you think. 

5. 前面读时觉得很不以为然，只是fuck这个重复得多而已，不就是精简你要的事情，选择更重要的去做。但是看到后面，突然明白了，说的就是我现在的状态啊，之前在中文也看过类似的表达， 年轻时以为什么都重要，其实长大了，也就没什么了。

When we’re young, everything is new and exciting, and everything seems
to matter so much. Therefore, we give ons of fucks. As we get older, with the benefit of experience (and having seen so much time slip by), we begin to notice that most of these sorts of things have little lasting impact on our lives.

Rejections that were painful in the moment have actually worked out for the best. We realize how little attention people pay to the superficial details about us, and we choose not to obsess so much over them.

Lions do not pay attention to the sheeps' words.

(A lion doesn't concern himself with the opinions of the sheep.)

Essentially, we become more selective about the fucks we’re willing to give. This is something called maturity This book will help you think a little bit more clearly about what you’re choosing to find important in life and what you’re choosing to find unimportant.

I see practical enlightenment as becoming comfortable with the idea that some
suffering is always inevitable——that no matter what you do, life is comprised of failures, loss, regrets, and even death. Because once you become comfortable with all the shit that life throws at you (and it will throw a lot of shit, trust me), you become invincible in a sort of low level spiritual way. 

感觉把 give a fuck 换成 have a try 其实是一样的，而且后者更文雅一点。